Funny newspaper headlines

Humorous headlines

The stuff is so ridiculous you can barely think of it as a serious or tragic story headline. Have fun.

• Something went wrong in a jet crash, Experts say (really?) 
• Police begin campaign to run down jaywalkers (oh that's fair!)
• Miners refuse to work after death (i wouldn't call that laziness boss!)
• Juvenile Court to try shooting defendant (a very short trial!)
• War dims hope for peace (absolutely)
• If strike not settled quickly, may last a while (you think?)
• Typhoon rips through cemetery, Hundreds dead (buried alive?)
• Cold wave linked to drop in temperature (unthinkable isn't it?)
• London couple killed, Police suspect murder (amazing deduction!)
• Man struck by lightening faces battery charge (cant a man charge his batteries in peace?!)
• Astronaut takes blame for gas in spacecraft (yo! eat some roughage!)
• Kids make nutritious snacks (for cannibals i presume!)
• Hospitals sued by 7 foot doctors (boy are they getting taller!)

and the winner is-

• Panda mating fails, veterinarian takes over (that's the last time i am going to a zoo!)